I think she is beginning to trust us ...
Kids who spend the first part of their lives in baby homes typically develop a certain degree of self-soothing behavior. Even though Addison came from a really great baby home and even though the caretaker to child ratio was fairly low, I believe it is inevitable that the kids will create alternative ways to cope. It can be anything, from sucking their thumb to rocking themselves to pulling their hair out (which I never saw at Addison's baby home ... just to be clear).
I know I've said before that Addison sucks on her two fingers ... and that is totally fine. Lots of kids suck on their fingers or suck their thumbs. Not a big deal. Do I believe it is one way that Addison copes with stressful situations? Yes, I do.
A few times since we picked Addison up from the baby home, I have caught her sort of rocking while she sucks on her fingers. I haven't really figured out if she is just playing ... or if she is soothing herself. I really am not trying to kid myself ... I do think this is one of her soothing behaviors. She is in no way obsessive about it and she is very easily distracted. We can curb the behavior by talking to her or picking her up ... it is that minimal, but alas it is there. I think I only saw her do it once today, so hopefully this will disappear quickly as she learns to trust us and depend on us.
I definitely have noticed some changes in Addison today ... I can tell she is trusting us on a deeper level. Some of the things I noticed today are ...
*Addison has been sleeping in a pack and play right next to our bed. Prior to today, she would just sit up and remain quiet when she woke up. Today, every time she woke up she cried for us to come get her. This tells me that she has learned that if she cries, we will respond to her immediately. The only time she has cried prior to today has been when we have given her a bath ... she doesn't like the water on her head.
*Another example of her crying for us to soothe her ... she was playing with Kyle's belt and the buckle hit her when she didn't expect it. She cried ... I'm not sure that it even really hurt her, it was just a large, metal buckle that she didn't realize would do whatever it was that it did. LOL. So I went to her, picked her up and told her it was okay ... and she immediately calmed down. This might seem so silly to everyone, but a good way to prove this is to tell you that yesterday, she accidentally hit her eye on a plate (the plate was on the bed ... she was eating fries off of the plate ... and she threw her head forward, hitting her eye on the plate) and she didn't even cry ... it barely phased her, even though it left a small mark. If that had happened now, I think she would probably cry. Crazy how things change in such a short period of time.
*After crying to get our attention when she is in her pack and play, she raises her arms up for us to pick her up. Up until today, she hasn't really initiated having us pick her up. I'm so happy that we are on the right track to getting her to initiate this ... she needs to know that she can come to us to be soothed, and I think she is catching on quickly.
These are just a couple examples of how I can tell she is starting to trust us. These things might sound so silly to everyone, but they are very real and important things that adoptive families have to deal with. The things we are dealing with are very minimal, but some families have very extensive issues to deal with and that can be hard.
So that is my story for today ... LOL.
I know I've said before that Addison sucks on her two fingers ... and that is totally fine. Lots of kids suck on their fingers or suck their thumbs. Not a big deal. Do I believe it is one way that Addison copes with stressful situations? Yes, I do.
A few times since we picked Addison up from the baby home, I have caught her sort of rocking while she sucks on her fingers. I haven't really figured out if she is just playing ... or if she is soothing herself. I really am not trying to kid myself ... I do think this is one of her soothing behaviors. She is in no way obsessive about it and she is very easily distracted. We can curb the behavior by talking to her or picking her up ... it is that minimal, but alas it is there. I think I only saw her do it once today, so hopefully this will disappear quickly as she learns to trust us and depend on us.
I definitely have noticed some changes in Addison today ... I can tell she is trusting us on a deeper level. Some of the things I noticed today are ...
*Addison has been sleeping in a pack and play right next to our bed. Prior to today, she would just sit up and remain quiet when she woke up. Today, every time she woke up she cried for us to come get her. This tells me that she has learned that if she cries, we will respond to her immediately. The only time she has cried prior to today has been when we have given her a bath ... she doesn't like the water on her head.
*Another example of her crying for us to soothe her ... she was playing with Kyle's belt and the buckle hit her when she didn't expect it. She cried ... I'm not sure that it even really hurt her, it was just a large, metal buckle that she didn't realize would do whatever it was that it did. LOL. So I went to her, picked her up and told her it was okay ... and she immediately calmed down. This might seem so silly to everyone, but a good way to prove this is to tell you that yesterday, she accidentally hit her eye on a plate (the plate was on the bed ... she was eating fries off of the plate ... and she threw her head forward, hitting her eye on the plate) and she didn't even cry ... it barely phased her, even though it left a small mark. If that had happened now, I think she would probably cry. Crazy how things change in such a short period of time.
*After crying to get our attention when she is in her pack and play, she raises her arms up for us to pick her up. Up until today, she hasn't really initiated having us pick her up. I'm so happy that we are on the right track to getting her to initiate this ... she needs to know that she can come to us to be soothed, and I think she is catching on quickly.
These are just a couple examples of how I can tell she is starting to trust us. These things might sound so silly to everyone, but they are very real and important things that adoptive families have to deal with. The things we are dealing with are very minimal, but some families have very extensive issues to deal with and that can be hard.
So that is my story for today ... LOL.